Outrageous Fashion! Onlookers Come Closer...

Back to our loved half-cow with more news! A NEW VOTE INCENTIVE IS UP! It's the much anticipated annual Halloween Bash. What is Minos' costume this year? HINT: It's not about WHAT Minos is wearing, it's about WHO he's wearing!!! Vote for the sizzling outfit, wear shades for your eyes might melt! VOTE HERE.

Is he hungry enough?

Comic updated last night :)

strip #146 TRICKY TREAT




Well, it appears Minos gets no treat but trick's on him! If I remember, I've seen that foxy lady before, and I believe Minos should've taken that apple! She's obviously a trickster, so kids (of all ages) if you're Trick-or-Treating and someone looking like her offers a juicy McIntosh (or celery, cucumber, asparagus or a freshly laid egg) DON'T TAKE IT! Unless you're Minos...

We celebrate Halloween today. The only day you can Cosplay and get something truly gratifying in return. (ok ok, other than Internet fame! But you can't eat that, can you? Smarties wins again!!!) This year I wanted to get dressed as Oprah Winfrey the 1987 Edition... But all my friends told me to go exactly as I did last year, as my interpretation of Adam in the Garden of Eden...Thus again I sacrifice my freedom of artistic expression due to peer pressure. This year my "Adam's costume" has some tear and wear, a few more holes, some stains... I hope I don't catch a cold out there in the merciless streets past 9:30pm...

Today Dumb Bum Comics celebrates an anniversary! It is 1 YEAR already since we came up with a brilliant idea! It's been germinating in our minds, scattered notes, lost post-its and haunting our dreams! Soon the world shall mildly rejoice to a NEW addition to the Dumb Bum Comics Family... It will be a ... ... ... WEBCOMIC!!!!! It's not exactly in our expertise area (nuclear potency tests) or our interest field (cattle) but it's pretty close to both, so we feel confident.... 12% of the time :) We are hoping for a 2011 Launch. We'll keep you posted, for no one else will!

Next strip will be in a week's time.

Deadly Revelations Bring Achy Tears

strip #145 THE BIGGEST LOSER




Hi there! Did you miss us? We are glad to present you a new Minos strip! This one concludes the Arc of the Oracle, and Minos made little progress once again. Some of you wrote to us expressing your delight with this arc, begging for it to last throughout the summer. And it did! Thanks to a few strategic delays. Who knew two strips could get us through an entire season? Surely beats reruns on tv, regardless of the country you are in. Yes, in some countries summer-time-tv is synonymous to live broadcasts of executions. It probably puts you in a mood for Minos where nobody dies... We're glad to be popular worldwide.

This summer was the hottest we've had in a decade here where we live. Now, WE (the altruistic fundamentalist group that is Dumb Bum) are aware that some people do not have air conditioning. We also know our Minotaur strips tend to rise by 16 degrees the temperature of any average horny teenager. Wanting to prevent a national epidemic of teenagers dying dehydrated (they are very loyal readers!) we took the moralistic road, opting to sacrifice our gigantic site traffic, and save a few lives instead. Now that the temperature is cooling, Minos is back, ready to claim that quarter per month from Google Ads! It's good to have Morals!

But now we have a buffer of comics, all of them very hot! The testing Panel that read them had to be hosed down repeatedly! Next time, another fancy lady enters Minos' life. Could she be THE ONE?... to kill him???

choosing sides

strip #144 SOCIALIST IN THE MAKING?




For a comic that has not updated for 2 weeks, you must think that's plenty of time to gather high quality news. Well, no. Time does not bring ANY news. How much longer could I wait? So I decided to update, even without any fresh useful news... Nobody told me it would be such an intellectual strain to make a webcomic! What is MSN doing about this?

Minos is cute. For the first time he's cuter than Bolanus, and we all know he's tough to beat! Hurray for Minos! 400 years of harsh existence, and he barely looks 69. Or 4 bovine years facially... What is his secret? Well, it's a secret so why would he tell you???

Next comic will be on a fine day, when the weather allows it, for the weather (and who ever is controlling it) is not not very helpful to local geeks... Come on, we have websites to update, video games to play... We can't be confined to a pool every day. Geeks are not very proficient at swimming, and even less so with bathing suits. The neighbors are starting to complain that I should wear one.

The Loxodonta Stomping Extravaganza

strip #143 RISK ASSESSMENT




This strip rises a very interesting question: Has Minos seen an elephant before? Does he know how cute they are when they are fed peanuts? Does he care? It does look like 3 questions to the nitpicking party-pooper out there, but it is really one question. It does defy the laws of grammar and mathematics simultaneously, but it's a world of probable improbabilities. I'm sure there's a scientist out there who is more than willing to waste 20 years of his life to prove my point! So go to work Bob, Susan, Nichi whatever your name is, 2030 is coming quickly!

I noticed I said a lot. Farewell. (POUF!) (Slips on magic Ring. If you can still see me, you are the exception like that Bombadill guy, so don't ruin the fun of the group, pretend that you don't see me, like you normally do...)

Next strip will be the next one to arrive!

Just an image caught in time

This was the Minos comic for May 22 2010 and the grim news that accompanied it :(

strip #142 DIGNITY UNDERCOVER




Here is the new strip! We had lots of ideas on how to validate this week's delay, MIND-BLOWING excuses, but we don't feel quite humorous at the Dumb Bum Studios this week, so we'll take a more serious approach.

Since our last update, two tragic events occurred in the Universe. I'm referring to the passing of Frank Frazetta and Ronnie James Dio. Both were LEGENDS in their respective fields and big inspirations for us here at Dumb Bum. Their art will live on!

We also wanted to do something special for Dio, so we made a portrait of him! Ronnie James Dio is the FIRST INDUCTEE into the DUMB BUM HALL OF OUR HEROES FAME. That is an honor by itself. It's also hard to get in it if you're alive, too difficult to draw or uninspiring.




Back to our stuff. Next update (and I just read the gag, you don't want to miss it!) will be obviously later than announced. I say on Tuesday!

A Minotaur's life (continued...)

strip #141 KEEP THE CHANGE




So what really happened in this strip? Minos seemed to have it all together, and then something mysteriously went wrong! I have a few speculations in mind:
- Minos is up for a beating, but he can't endure psychological terror that well... Who can blame him, he can't be good at everything!
- He waited too long, hyped the possibilities, and then he couldn't take it! He needs to learn to breathe deeply from the diaphragm and exhale as deeply.
- His quick surrender is but an act, one deliberate move in a grander war strategy! The only problem with this theory: Minos surely doesn't understand most of those words...
- Or could it be that Minos doesn't really want to die? Could he be too fond of his son to leave him behind?
- Or could it all be pointing to an UNSOLVED MYSTERY???

For those of you who wonder who won the MINOAN VACATION, let me tell you that there was not 1, but multiple winners! We had more than one trip to give away! A trip to Humor Victimization Island! That's right, it was our 2010 April Fool's thing that we do... Once again people cried, threatened... I had to book 5 Confession Appointments to cast away the guilt. True, most of that guilt came from when I publicly mocked all known religions to my knowledge. But the timing with the Minoan Vacation Gag was too close to diagnose the EXACT source of guilt. So we all lost this year :(

Next strip, because there WILL BE A NEXT STRIP for the pessimistic skeptics, will be on Monday! (Gamblers, learn from Minos' mistakes, keep your coins, and don't bet on our schedule...)

THE GREAT VACATION GIVEAWAY!

strip #140 CRACK THAT BONEHEAD




Here it is, the new comic strip! Look at how cute Minos looks on the first panel! Look at ALL the panels, he is cute everywhere! At last this comic has some violence! Could it be that strip 141 will be the last one? Could it? I'm very excited about the brutality. And I'm also very excited because we have BIG NEWS this time!!!


!!!CONTEST CONTEST CONTEST!!!



We are usually surprised when we learn that anyone reads Minos! Now imagine how we fell on the floor when Samuel Beckett told us he is a BIG Minos fan! We went like Samuel who? But it doesn't really matter, because mister Beckett is a Senior Flight Manager at Expedia!!! (Finally Microsoft promotes the right people for the job! hehehe)

The REALLY GREAT NEWS came to us after a few email exchanges with this very nice fan! He offered us a TRIP FOR 2 TO KNOSSOS, CRETE, so we can visit the ancient Minoan ruins!!! Ain't he great?

As exciting as it was for us, we decided to give it away as A CONTEST PRIZE to a LUCKY FAN!!! Many of you have been loyal readers for years, and we wanted to give you something special! (Something we haven't paid for!!! Which makes it even better for all!)

CONTEST RULES!
- Send us an email with your answers to the following questions about the comic: 1) In one of the strips, Minos swallows a key. What hand did he use to put it in his mouth? 2) How many drinks one should consume (according to Minos) to breed a Minotaur child? 3) What is the name of the bearded bandit with the orange sandals?

Those are tough questions! EMAIL US the answers to become eligible for the VACATION DRAW! Now remember:
-1 ENTRY PER EMAIL ADDRESS ONLY!
-You must be 18 or over to claim the prize! If you're under 18, make sure someone over 18 (that you trust!) claims it for you! LOL
-The trip includes a 7 day vacation for 2 adults, airfare tickets, all-inclusive stay at the Kastro Hotel in Heraklion, Crete, and a guided tour of the Minoan Ruins! What else you do is up to you! (The winner has until August 2011 to claim the prize) The draw will be done on April 15th 2010 at noon!

You have until April 15 at 11:59am to enter the contest! Good Luck to All!!!

The world's finest cow brain Hors D'oeuvre

strip #139 DANGEROUS LIAISONS




HURRAY! After much internal turmoil at the Dumb Bum Headquarters, we provide you a new strip! Apparently a new character is on its way, with intrigue! And possibly a punchline, or even a punch...

What? You want to know about the Internal Turmoil Case? You want to know what was tearing the Dumb Bum Crew Apart? What only medical stitching could fix? Well ok I'll tell you. But make no mistake, the ONLY reason I am sharing this info is because I am so convinced I was in the right, I don't mind sharing!

Last week, someone suggested we could save money by changing our model for someone less experienced. DUMB IDEA!!!! (That is what I said.) I'm talking of course about the model used for Minos' cow shots. The human parts are easy, anyone can model for those! But try to find a cooperative cow, and you tell me how right I was!

After a trip to the butcher, the petting-zoo (yes, the one we are banned from), the other zoo (yes, the one we are banned from also), the cow ranch and the modern arts museum... Guess who won the argument??? Not me. :( We agreed on a plastic cow toy and dismissed the model.

So we bid farewell to our cow model. I am sure it will find work quickly, for it was a very HOT LOOKING piece of meat. But when you see it all over Magazine Covers, Milk Cartons, and other places cow models work, know that WE gave it its first BIG BREAK! Good Luck PHILEMOINE!

To forget our grief over such a parting, we drowned ourselves in work! So we updated the LINKS PAGE with some new titles. Check them out!

Next update will hit THIS PAGE on Wednesday. But keep looking daily, we can use the hits! wink wink...

Take this, UHAA!

strip #138 SECOND OPINION




Did anyone else notice this EXTREMELY LONG WEEKEND we just had??? Like Sunday Alone lasted for 175 hours!!! WWWOOOWWWW!!!!! I had time to do so much. But it had to end like all the normal weekends, and as promised (Because you know how Dumb Bum ALWAYS sticks to what it promises... not like Obama... Poumplovich is still crying man!!! Do something about it! He's a grown man, it gets uncomfortable for me to see him in that state... asking for comfort! ... DO SOMETHING!!!) Minos updated right after the weekend! Today on Monday the 13th, you can enjoy the NEW strip.

Many MANY fans are asking how we follow-up from one gag to the next. Well, it is not as easy as it appears... It is HARD! Hours of research have to be put into it! We have to go to the library, Museums, Greek Restaurants, and study how the Minoans built city dumps. It is very useful in order to understand their everyday patterns. If we wanna do a follow-up, we better be precise!

That is mainly to avoid NEW complaints from the UHAA (the Uptight Historians Association Abroad). After gag #33, we suffered their nagging for months! They said we portrayed Thor inaccurately. If we had our mythology straight, they said, Thor would be more grabby and his legs much hairier. They then offered to "straighten our mythology" for us... Not knowing what that meant, we declined and called the cops! Justly so apparently...

HAMMERFALL!!! HAMMERFALL!!! HAMMERFALL!!!

If you don't know who HAMMERFALL is, I urge you to watch this informative video!


They have a sense of humor, they have no sense of curling, they know more than us about minotaurs, and they have a clean record with the UHAA so far! What is there not to like?

If their AWESOMENESS wins you over, you can watch their concert LIVE on March 16 (or a rebroadcast on March 21st) FOR FREE!!!! Here is where. I saw them live during my 175-hour-Sunday, and they are worth it for ya too... Even if you work for the UHAA... Hum... Maybe that would cheer up James Edward Poumplovich! Who knows? He doesn't want to get over his problems if you ask me...

We normally can't plug anyone or anything: We are bound by oath to the Shadow Forces of the Webcomic World, but we are rebels! What will they do to us? Cancel our prepaid subscription to the Squirrels Live Webcam? HAHAHAHAHA... seriously guys, DON'T! That channel is my life!!!! :(

Next update soon enough.

Back again

The last 2 Minos comic updates:
strip #136 MURDER HE KNOWS
strip #137 PLAN B THE UNDERSTUDY




So here we are with an update! But before we talk about Minos let's talk about our favorite topic: Delays! This delay was partially the fault of Obama who did not stick to his word and left the UN meeting without announcing anything concerning Minos the Minotaur, leaving a James Edward Poumplovich broken-hearted. This delay was also integrally caused by the Winter Olympics. Those who read Minos the Minotaur (all 3 of you with multiple IPs) know that we never update during the Olympics.

But these Olympics were special. We got to participate, making sure the world could enjoy sports such as Curling, Bobsleigh and many more! Dumb Bum was selected by an elite panel, for our known integrity and commitment to excellence. We received 3 votes more than the Sutherland Family!!! We got selected as The Official Golden Boy of 2010. In other words we personally carried all the urine samples from the hand of the athletes to the testing lab. For athletes, some of them sure lack hand-eye coordination, believe me. No, we didn't do this to learn who has herpes, but because we made the assumption that after fulfilling our task, they would hand over the country to us as a token of gratitude.

Unfortunately our plan backfired when no athlete was found doped at these games. We were then accused of swapping urine samples with our own. Like how much do they think we can provide? The only silver lining to this shameful experience is that I now have in my fridge Apollo Anton Ohno's DNA. A full pint of it. But you can't find it. I have labeled it as lemonade.

Next comic will arrive swiftly, like the swiftest wind ever blown by man upon man. That will be around the week-end.

Does father know best?

strip #135 KNOW ME WETTER




So what do you think folks? Is the little Minotaur a serial killer in the making? Well, don't tell me, I don't want you later to claim that I stole your plot idea! When a comic company gets to a certain point in its expansion, they have to be careful not to accidentally steal other people's ideas. Like Marvel for instance. OK, we are not nearly as big, reputable or flatulent as Marvel, but we are practicing.

It's good to see Minos encouraging his kid for a change. More fatherly love next time! But when is next time?

Later tonight methinks.

Don't be a sore winner

strip #134 OH! THAT'S NASTY




This one is for the Sadist in all of us! You really need to connect with Billy-The-Sadist inside you, in order to crack a smile.

I guess this mini-arc is mounting into a soap opera Minotaur Style! Oh the Drama!

Next strip, the tension continues to grow. I'm sure there'll be an outcome at the end... Maybe earlier... Why save everything for last and ruin the possibility of a flat ending? You only get one of those to ruin. As I was saying, next strip will be during the weekend.

Let the games begin

strip #133 RULE THIS OUT




So who could predict such an outrageous outcome? Minos is clever! (most would say he is a cheater, but it's the closest he ever came to a quality, so I say "CLEVER"... Please don't spoil his fun.)

Will Tic-Tac-Toe be the end of Minos? Was death child's play all along? Or does that little minotaur conceal a chainsaw under his diaper-shaped loincloth? It might be news to some of you, but kids are violent these days. I personally blame video games. Pac-Man teaches nasty behavior. And don't get me started on that "Miss" Pac-Man...

Next time, we will reveal why Minos needs to better assess his opponents. And that will be on Majestic Tuesday!!!

Comic time

strip #132 FAULTY FUN




The NEW YEAR is upon us (hey, it's still new! I was in a coma for 17 days, so I don't care if you got used to it, it's "NEW" to me!) and what better way to make it feel normal by welcoming it with a new Minos strip! They have something in common: they are both NEW!!! They are made for each other. Who matched them up? I DID! If there are any desperate single people out there, send me your stats and I'll set you up with someone (or something) in RECORD TIME!

This got me thinking. It's not just desperate singles who read Minos the Minotaur, there might be some celebrities too! Why not? For sure Robert DeNiro fits my idea of a Minos reader. I bet Vladimir Putin is promoting it to all his friends too! If there was no language barrier, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad would go all Nuclear about it, I'm sure... Christian Schneider (the SUPER FAMOUS creator of the damned Gummy Bear Song) reads Minos for sure, language barrier or not! I hope he sees what's good for him and makes a song out of Minos. That would propel him to SUPER STARDOM FOREVER!

But my speculations aren't enough to satisfy my curiosity. So if any CELEBRITY (yes, I'm including YOU Pauly Shore) reads this comic, which is Highly Likely, please email me your name. I won't tell the press, just my psychiatrist. He always probes me about that kind of stuff, I think he tries to live through me...

2010 Brings RESOLUTIONS! Our resolutions for Minos the Minotaur in 2010 are the following:
- Have a Regular Update Schedule Thrice a Week. The Comic will Update on Mondays and TWICE on Thursdays!
- Sell Minos Plush Toys for 3.25$ and clay Statues for 11.82$
- Include the words "Muffin", "Spatula", "Crevasse" and "Argentine Tango" in strips featuring Bolanus the Centaur.
- Pitch Minos the Minotaur Movie: "Once Upon Horns" to three Production Companies in Romania, Taiwan and Poland in that order!
- Gain 16.35 Trillion from the Success of The Minos Movie AND sales of related merchandise (1 billion at least from the Cheese graters!)
- Buy Google and rename it MOOOOgle
- We will refuse Marvel's pitch to have the Incredible Hulk appear in our comic as a manure customer.

Of course, the only resolution we tend not to break is Number 4!

Next Update will be later today... on THURSDAY! That's our resolution! Right?